Snail's Super Sunday! Gig-Watching 101
On Thursday night, I went to see The Darkness. They were awesome, despite the fact that their 2nd album kinda sucks. Highlights included a cover of AC/DC’s ‘Highway to hell’ and the KISS-inspired guitar moves. No skin-tight jumpsuits this time though – Hawkins the elder has put on some weight.
On Thursday night, I went to see The Darkness. They were awesome, despite the fact that their 2nd album kinda sucks. Highlights included a cover of AC/DC’s ‘Highway to hell’ and the KISS-inspired guitar moves. No skin-tight jumpsuits this time though – Hawkins the elder has put on some weight.
Total non-highlights included:
1) The fact that it was at The Palace 
(knock that thing down, I say!)
(knock that thing down, I say!)
2) The number of crowdsurfers (just watch the f*&king show, you c*&ts. Moreover, stop using me as a stool!)
3) This couple in front of me who insisted on talking and kissing during the show, thus blocking my view. GRRRRRRRR!
This has led me to compile a list of Snail’s Gig-Watching Etiquette.
1) NO FAT CHICKS OR FAT GUYS. Fat pushy people are the absolute pits. Unless you’ve paid twice the price to take up twice the room, you should leave and stop squashing others with your flab.
2) Stop pushing me from behind thinking I will relent and let you through.
3) Crowd surfing went out in the 90s, along with grunge and flannelette.
4) Numerous trips to the bar are not cool. Making room for you to get in and out, and almost losing my position in the process, is enough to make me want to use that beer bottle of yours to permanently deform you.
5) If you insist on bringing a partner who doesn’t know anything about the band playing the gig, ensure that:
a. They don’t say things like “Wow, this sounds like that Rogue Traders song” or “I saw Thirsty Merc here once”
b. They know that there is to be no talking, kissing or fondling during the gig. Gigs are for watching the band – if you want to do otherwise, get a room.
c. Make sure they’re not fat
6) There is no point holding up your mobile phone, either trying to take a picture or to make someone who isn’t there listen to a song. They both end up with bad quality, and more importantly, I CAN’T SEE!
7) Headbopping + dreadlocks = Snail with a very itchy nose and increasing homicidal intent.
I can’t think of anymore at the moment. I’m sure there are more. People (in general) are total losers.
Ed: And from Pans... on a completely unrelated note.... I did this medical specialty quiz, and this is what I got..
The medical specialty for you is.... Psychiatry
Ed: And from Pans... on a completely unrelated note.... I did this medical specialty quiz, and this is what I got..
The medical specialty for you is.... Psychiatry
Psychiatry is the best of all specialties. As a psychiatrist, people may claim that you went into the field because you yourself are crazy. But only you know the truth, which is that you are crazy. Enjoy the ride.
To find out what specialty best fits your unique personality, go to:
9 comments:
The medical specialty for you is.... OB/GYN OB/GYN is the best of all specialties. As an OB/GYN, you have chosen one of the most noble fields in medicine. You will work longer hours than a surgeon, but without the high pay. But you will still do it because you have a passion for the field. And after you rush to the hospital at 3 in the morning for the third night in a row to deliver a baby, the parents will turn around and sue you if there were any unforeseeable complications, which is why your insurance rates are so ridiculously high. Come to think of it, OB/GYN?? What were you thinking?
...grr.
Just because my favourite colour is pink and I wanted to be a ballerina (actually, Iwanted to be a nurse, but that wasn't an option) doesn't mean I want to spend the rest of my career looking at vaginas.
You wanted to be a ballerina? Hehehehe. I answered that question as "I want to be a bum".
Now THIS personality test is the absolute most accurate super-duper freakiest ever. Ever!!! You must do it now!
Are you friggin kidding me? That colour test is so inaccurate!
It said my main problem was that I tried charming my way into things - I am like the most uncharming person ever. I never charm anyone.
Pffft.
snail, eet ees super accurate!!! really really, ask suds!
and you are charming in your own doe-eyed, innocent, puppy way :P
teehee. i am due for a murderalizing, aren't i?
That colour test is freaking insane!
I think it uses illegal, alien mind reading technology.
panini, the link didn't work
wtf is everyone going on about?
Beck - it is good that the link didnt work because it really isnt that accurate (one might say a little generic), and a waste of time.
FF, the link is www.colorquiz.com
And in terms of wasting time- what the hell else is time for?
'Feels frustrated by the slowness with which events develop'. That, my friends, is why I tailgate people and speed. Thank you, color quiz.
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